Why Swift Was Right About 22.

I have a love/hate relationship with my life right now. 

Melodramatic? Probably. 

But hey, I'm twenty-two, and according to T.Swift, it's also totally acceptable. 

( lest us throw our hands up // dance in rejoice )

If you can't relate to my following babble, my apologies, but I'd like to believe that you may just happen to find something useful out of the following words, anyways.

For those who can

1) My sympathies

2) Consider the following as an attempt to ease your (possibly) melodramatic soul, as well

So, Let's Begin.  

Not to jump the gun on conversation, or debate, but I think I have an answer to the question:
Is it actually possible to feel happy, free, confused & lonely at the exact same time?

And that answer is a plain and simple, yes. 
Now let me explain why I think so.

We very recently closed an important chapter in our lives, titled "College."
The decision to pack up four year's worth of experiences, memories and relationships, in the very suitcases we walked out the door of our first 'grown-up' homes with, was not our own.
And we're feeling a little bitter about it.

We involuntarily put an end to one era, and so began a new one.
One where the stuff being thrown at us started exposing emotions we didn't even know we had.

And just like that, life started getting sporadic.
More stuff started happening, but this time the kind that changed everything.
Questions were thrown at us. 
The same, monotonous kind that we would rather just not have to worry about answering. 
(Partially because we hate small talk conversations, but mostly because we don't even have an answer to them in the first place.)

What jobs have you applied for? 
Where do you see yourself living? 
Are you dating? (My personal favorite) 
What are your financial plans for those student loan bills comin' up darlin'?

It wasn't really out of "nowhere" that this all happened.
We knew there would come a day when it was no longer "socially" acceptable to pull half (or even a quarter) of the stuff we did during our glorious undergrad years.
Which includes making excuses in times like this.
And that just sucks.

But you know something that I've realized from it all?
We're in this together. 

It doesn't matter if we were fortunate enough to walk out of college into a full-time position in the field of our dreams, or stare into the eyes of 2-5-10+ more years of schooling, or even move back home to save some money and figure out what exactly it is we want to do with our lives.

When it comes down to it, we all came from the same place.
And who is better to understand what you're feeling, than the person next to you who went through the exact same thing?
Try that for comfort.

Since I've graduated, I can't tell you how many things I've learned about myself and the immediate, fast-paced world around me. It's given me a chance to reflect on all of those crazy souls that I've had the pleasure of meeting throughout the past four years alone. The kind of people that talk you into "just one more" Whiskey Sour during Finn's Karaoke Wednesday, and drag you to Nadine's the following morning to down the best breakfast bowl - called "The Mixed Grill" - that you could ever possibly dream of. And, of course, the gems in life that let you borrow their flash drive for the final Photography assignment because yours didn't have enough storage space. And, lastly, who could forget the roommate- turned-best friend from sophomore year that just so happen to own the assigned seat next to you at college graduation. 

Realize that all of these good and bad times you've experienced in your life are in LARGE part because you experienced them with (and many times because) of those others. 

Those others that are just as scared, intimidated, and uncertain about their lives right now, as you are. 

So, 22.

It may seem like just an age, but it's so much more than that. 

It's the time in life when you're forced into making very difficult decisions. 

When you're forced to say some really sappy goodbyes, and close some really gigantic doors (or chapters.)

But, in the process, please don't make the mistake of confusing closing for locking.

Life may be changing - we may be changing - but hey, that's what makes it so T. Swift magical right?

Do yourself a favor and consider this time a rare opportunity.

Breathe. Feel alive again in a way that you haven't for quite some time. Alive in the sense that you feel confused, anxious, but excited and happy about it. 

Let this brief period of loneliness drive you to be motived. 

Seek to learn something that a textbook didn't teach you and professor couldn't lecture about. 

Take this time, above all, to do you, 

during this once in a lifetime age of twenty-two. 

(cause it only happens once.)

in·spi·ra·tion

in·spi·ra·tion

ˌinspəˈrāSHən/

noun

1. 1.

   the process of being mentally stimulated to do or feel something, esp. to do something creative.

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I woke up today and I just felt, inspired.
A word that we throw around so often.
A feeling that we desire more often than possess.

But it's not our faults. It's not anybody's fault.
Inspiration has a funny way of finding us when we're busy doing something else. 
When we're busy living our lives. Taking part in our every day tasks.

And life itself is complicated. It's tricky.
Our lives our complicated. They feature one slightly manic - let me speak for myself here, please - star(lette) and the many creatures, relationships, and experiences that they encounter on a daily basis.
And that daily basis turns itself into a collection of days, months, years. Good days, bad days, holidays, birthdays. And all of those days are set in an uncensored, unfiltered world.

so, when does inspiration happen?

Inspiration happens when we discover what keeps that mad world turning for us. It's the answer to why we wake up some mornings and hear the birds chirping a little louder than they were the day before. And not that annoying chirp, but the kind of chirp that makes us think of warmth, and Spring turning to Summer, and enjoying a melting popsicle as we sit poolside with our best friend. It's why today, of all days, we gather this internal gratitude for the sun as it makes it's way pass that grassy mountain over the hill, only to dance amongst the tree branches and cast our shadow against the sidewalk that we travel everyday to work. Or at night, to the bars. Or, anytime, to yoga class. But at all times, the sidewalk that we fail to note how unique it's existence is to our very own urban neighborhood. Just think for a moment, how many feet have walked over it? How many drinks, from our cup or bottle alone, have been spilt on it?

Inspiration happens when we start to believe again, if not for the first time, in this crazy thing called love. I'm not just talking about the type that happens when we meet our much-anticipated soulmates. Because even those floating around with inspiration coming out of their ears, may not believe that such a thing exists. I mean, they are more inclined to believe that love itself exists, but the whole term soulmate, well that's a discussion for another day. What I'm getting at instead, is love in its most basic and natural form, is inspiration. Think of the very first relationship we were ever a part of, and hopefully still are. The one created for us. The one that we were born into, and that if we are lucky, means more to us than any other. And then think of the one(s) that we have built with others, through others, with their help. Their cooperation, their trust. These are the kind that we've grown into. Friends, lovers, coworkers, role models and idols, strangers. Those who inspire us, without even knowing it. Without even meaning to. Those with an existence that has a way of making ours a little sweeter.



Inspiration happens when you find a purpose for the ups-downs, the words-sentences-phrases-sayings-quotes, the sweet'n'sour'n'salty'n'bitter tastes, the wind-rain-sleet-snow-SUNSHINE, and, most importantly, the very air that we breathe.
The very air that we so tragically take for granted. Yet, that we share.

Isn't funny how often we forget that?

That believe it or not, we share the most essential element to each and every one of our lives.

CRAZY, I know I know.
Mind blowing, actually.

Maybe, even, a tad bit inspiring?

Above all though, there's only one place that inspiration happens... 
And I think I'll leave it up to you to guess just where that place may be.

xox, A.